Finding Your Center in the Midst of Chaos

In episode 158 of The Empowered and Embodied Show, Kim Romain and Louise Neil hit record mid-conversation—and trust us, you’ll be glad they did. What started as a check-in about feeling “wobbly” quickly unraveled into a rich, raw, and real exploration of how planetary shifts, inner pressure, and collective noise can leave us spinning... and how to come back to our center.

Through personal stories, Human Design insights, and plenty of embodied wisdom, they unpack what it means to move through uncertainty with grace, and how to tell the difference between what’s truly yours and what’s just static.

“Personal agency starts with knowing what's yours. Liberation begins when you stop holding what isn’t.” - Kim Romain

“The static is everywhere—socially, politically, personally. But that doesn’t mean we have to amplify it.” - Louise Neil

Key Takeaways:

• Wobble ≠ stuck—there’s power in recognizing the difference
• How planetary shifts amplify inner and outer noise
• The role of Human Design in navigating aligned action
• Real-time tools to return to your body and reset your focus
• Why personal agency and liberation start with asking, “What is mine?”

Key Moments:

00:00 - Intro and welcome
01:34 - Why are we all feeling wobbly?
02:43 - Planetary shifts, energetic overwhelm, and the pressure to "do it all"
07:11 - Defining ease vs. hustle—what real alignment feels like in the body
13:28 - From aligned research to perfectionist spiral... getting out of the rabbit hole
19:35 - Completion, closure, and honoring what’s ready to be done
22:52 - What is yours to hold vs. what’s just noise?
32:06 - Reframing “stuck” as a moment of reflection, not failure
35:50 - Crossing the river: a metaphor for fear, trust, and deciding what matters
44:07 - Living selfishly as a form of service—claiming your right to alignment

Join a circle of changemakers committed to leading with purpose, presence and ease inside Kim's Rising Visionaries community and mentorship program.

Reclaim your career and confidence during midlife through Louise's Rise & Redefine program.

If you’re loving this show, come check out the Feminist Podcasters Collective, where creators like us are uplifting diverse voices and driving meaningful change. If you’re looking for new shows to fill your feed, head to feministpods.com to explore everything we have to offer.

Transcript

The Empowered and Embodied Show

Episode 158: Finding Your Center in the Midst of Chaos

Hosts: Kim Romain & Louise Neil

Release Date: May 6, 2025

Kim Romain (00:26): Hi there, welcome to the Empowered and Embodied show. I'm Kim Romain.

Louise Neil (00:31): And I'm Louise Neil. We're two transformational coaches who are also fellow travelers on the path of growth and self-discovery. And we're inviting you along for the ride.

Kim Romain (00:41): That's right. We're right here in the trenches with you navigating the ups and downs of life. And each week we'll be sharing our own experiences, bringing you conversations with amazing guests, and exploring insights and strategies that have helped us find more clarity, confidence and ease in our lives. And trust us, we do not have it all figured out. We're learning and growing right alongside you. So if you're ready to rise above the chaos, doubt and confusion that sometimes life throws our way and step into a more empowered and embodied version of yourself, then you're in the right place. Let's get started.

Kim Romain (01:34): Hi there, everyone. Welcome. So we actually just hit record because we were in the middle of a fascinating conversation, Louise and I, and we're going to pick up the conversation from where we left off and you're going to get to listen to the rest of it. So welcome, Louise.

Louise Neil (01:50): Yeah. Hi. Okay, so let's start with the big shifts. Tell me again so that I can fully embody what you were saying around why am I wobbly?

Kim Romain (02:13): Yeah. Yeah. Why are we all fucking wobbly? So what I was saying in that moment when you were like, just hit record, was that we right now, and this is just my take, right now, we are, there's a lot of outer planetary movement. So the planets that barely ever move are moving. And so that's why we hear things like, this is the first time in 465 years, the first time in 130 years, the first time—

Louise Neil (02:16): Yeah.

Kim Romain (02:43): Right? The way the planets are lining up and planets create energy, they have energetic fields, Earth has an energetic field, humans have an energetic field. So the way that these planets are lining up, we've never experienced before. No human alive has ever experienced before. Humanity has, but we as humans who are alive today have not. Right? And so as they're lining up, a lot of us are sitting around here going, how do I, what do I, what do I need? This feels, what do I do? Whereas on the other end of the spectrum, there's a lot of freaking noise happening in the world, politically, apolitically, unrest here, there and other where they're not worrying about what are the planets doing or what am I doing in my business or what am I doing in my career or what am I doing in my relationship? They're just doing it. And that is the energy of now is to do the shit because we now have new energy to do it.

Louise Neil (03:53): So that feels like, so yeah, right? Yes. Like the do it energy. And I find that sometimes my do it energy is like, completely overwhelming me. Like do what? Do it all? Do this, do that? Like—

Kim Romain (03:58): Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Kim Romain (04:14): Right. Well, and okay. So asterisk, when I say do it energy, like, no, we're not all designed to be in action all the time. We're not all, no, no, please no. We're not all designed and nor are the planets aligned or whatever. We're not having transits where every single one of us is taking action in alignment for ourselves. That's not, but there's a lot of energy, a lot of shifting energy. And so what does it mean to you? If you're feeling wobbly, what are you feeling wobbly about?

Louise Neil (04:54): Well, you said that we're in alignment. And so I believe when I am wobbly, like when I am like stressing out about all the shit that needs to get done or stuff I think I should be doing, that is not aligned with me. Like I can feel it in my body. I can feel when things are aligned, like it comes from down here, right? Like, yeah, it comes from like this, like there's such a dichotic feeling between like when I'm operating from this space and when I'm operating from this space. And it just feels completely different in my body.

Kim Romain (05:31): Yeah, so your sacral center. Yeah.

Louise Neil (05:51): It, feels like staticky and sorry. yeah.

Kim Romain (05:52): Your head center for those that are just listening. Yeah. When you're operating from your head center.

Kim Romain (06:05): Come over to video if you wanna see the hand motions. No, your head center, yeah. When you're operating from your head center.

Louise Neil (06:05): Right? Like, like loud and staticky. And, and I think in that space, there's a lot of loudness that's coming from the environment as well, that is adding to this static. And it's coming at me in all kinds of ways and directions, right? Politically, socially, what I'm, what I want to be doing, how do I like, all here and I notice that I'm just feeling a little bit frazzled and then I have a hard time saying, okay, well, what should I be doing? Where am I focusing my energy? And when I can touch back into this deeper, you called it flow earlier, this state of like, I don't know, it was almost like, grace was the word that came up like this, just this, right? A much calmer place to be. Things are so much easier.

Kim Romain (07:11): Yeah, that's why I talk about ease because it is ease. Like that to me is ease. What you're describing is that place where we can breathe. Like we're moving forward, we're doing something, we're productive or whatever word resonates with you, you're doing something and yet you can still breathe. You're not feeling the constriction, you're not feeling the burden, you're not feeling rushed or hurried or pushed or pulled. You just in, some people call it flow. Right? I call it ease because it comes with ease. It's like, okay, yeah, I may be something hard, maybe learning something new, but it comes from that place of, you you said grace. It's like, yeah, there's a, there's a softness to it that, that I, I think we absolutely feel when we are in alignment with ourselves, but we're not in alignment with ourselves most of the time.

Louise Neil (08:26): Right, right. And so what comes to mind, Kim, is that, so how do I or how do you not me, I was like, how do you use this, like this alignment or this like, whatever that is for you that ease or flow place? Like, how do you use it to guide what you do in business life? Pick a area? Like, how do you use it? How do you use it?

Kim Romain (08:35): Mm-hmm.

Kim Romain (08:46): whatever. Yeah. How do I use it? So I use it, I use the concept of ease as a way to come back to myself. So I know when it's loud, right? And I'm very much like you, it's usually pretty loud in my head. And there can be a million things that are calling for my attention. And the, you know, it's the sheds and the, the did you do's and shit, I forgot. And, you know, all this stuff with the back ground noise of what's happening in the world, which is pretty loud in my head all the time, with what's going on with my family, like caring for it. So there's a lot, right, that is in there all the time. And if I am zoning out, if I am working on something but not really aware of what I'm working, like I'm just going through the motions. Or if I am avoiding stuff, like a big, thing that I notice is because I'm an, I'm a waiter by nature. That's one of my, my saboteurs that gets in my way is I avoid doing stuff, my head in the sand. I pause and sometimes that pause is like more than a minute. I pause and they go, okay, what am I really experiencing in this moment?

Kim Romain (09:58): And there's only one way I can experience anything. There's only one way any of us can experience anything and that's by feeling it. It's what's going on in my body. So if I'm, if I'm avoiding doing a task, so there was a report that I was doing for a client recently and there was energetically, it was just off. Like I can't even tell you why I didn't want to do this report. I just didn't want to do the report. And I kept putting it off. kept putting it off. I kept putting it off. I kept putting it off. And I'm like, what is going on here? I didn't need to know why, but I needed to know what. And what I felt in my body was a was a strong resistance. I felt like a pit in my stomach and like a pushing sensation in my chest when I thought about working on it.

Kim Romain (10:47): I needed to get it done. The client was expecting it. And so I, I, again, I sat with myself and I said, where is the ease here? And what I realized was there was one part of the report that I was actually looking forward to doing, but it was the end of the report. So like normally I wouldn't get to it until the end. And I said, fuck it. And I started there. And then I got interested in what I was doing. And so while it was still hard because I still didn't want to do this thing. And to this day, I do not know why this one report was driving me nuts. I found an entrance point for me to get done the work that I needed to get done. And on, you know, in retrospect, I'm like, is it the type of report that I'm offering that is out of alignment now? Like I'm still figuring that out, but it's listening to my body and it's saying, okay, what

Kim Romain (11:40): And it's testing it and a lot of that so I can tell you what works for me, but Knowing yourself like knowing what those sensations those feelings those thoughts is whatever for you, but also understanding like You're a five one Profile type. I'm a four six profile type. I have a three kind of built into my six, which a three line built into my six. This is all Human design mechanical stuff, but the three is trial and error. So for me, what I found is when I'm in a growth edge, when I'm doing something that I need to work through, I need to do trial and error. And that will allow me to get through. You need to know for yourself, probably with that one line is investigation. Like what more do I need to know? But then also not getting yourself caught in the loop of now I need to know more.

Louise Neil (12:46): Hmm. Well, sure, absolutely, right? Because I love it. I love data. I love, I love it. And right. It's like, Ooh, what do I need to know? And it's like, Ooh, I need to know this and then this and then this and then this. And then that's why my saboteur is almost perfectionism is because I'm like looking for like the perfect answer or the perfect thing or the perfect next step. And I will only find it through research. And so that's a little bit of like,

Kim Romain (13:14): Mm-hmm.

Louise Neil (13:28): my loop that I get on is like, I can absolutely like think. And here's the thing that I I feel is interesting is that I feel like I'm in alignment to start with because I'm like, ooh, I'm investigating, I'm researching, like this is fantastic. And then it's something switches and all of a sudden it's like, like my vision narrows, like I just get like so into it that I can't get out of it. And I'm like, I'm in it. I'm like down every fricking rabbit hole you can possibly imagine with 37 tabs open on Google. then then nevermind the other window I have over here on this monitor with other things. And then I'm like, what was that? I read this before. Where was that? And now, right, an hour goes by and now I'm all of a sudden feeling even more overwhelmed because

Kim Romain (14:05): Listen.

Louise Neil (14:27): Not only did I not get the answer I was looking for, now I have eight more questions to answer. And then what? I did.

Kim Romain (14:32): Yeah, because you start in an alignment and then you switched into shadow. Because just like I was saying with the planets, the planets are, we're all dealing with the same energy. We are all dealing with the same energy. It's how we uniquely understand how we operate with the energy so it's actually working for us and not against us. And that's where this conversation started offline. You brought something forward and I said, well, that's actually working kind of against the energy that we're being offered right now.

Louise Neil (15:01): Mm-hmm.

Kim Romain (15:08): What would it be like to work with it?

Louise Neil (15:10): I don't know.

Kim Romain (15:11): Hahaha! Most of us don't. Most of us don't even, like, I don't know how many people who do this work actually do the work.

Louise Neil (15:25): I'm We can just go down that rabbit hole about all kinds of like shit I'm seeing on social media about people, right? Like talking pretty loud and not doing any of the work that goes behind that. but yeah, it's interesting because, know, you and I, come on here every week and we talk about not just what the work looks like, but how we're doing it. Because What the work looks like is sure, there's a journey towards that, right? Your self-awareness piece, your, what do I, who am I, how am I aligned, that kind of stuff. And how do we put it into practice in a way that we practice? And this comes, think, where you and I both share something is that like, we do need to practice it. Like we do need to trial and error it. And I'm trying really hard to be more in that space, because guess what trial and error gets me?

Kim Romain (16:33): Yeah, 100 % it gets you data. Yeah, yeah, 100%. And it's so funny because I've had this conversation so many different places this week where the number of people that we're seeing in the world who are seeing, experiencing whatever in the world that are

Louise Neil (16:37): you

Kim Romain (16:55): spouting information, giving information, and yet you can really see one of two things is happening. One, they haven't done their work around the thing that they're sharing in the world. And two, they haven't done a lot of the work that's a precursor to the work that they're sharing into the world. it's like, their mid cycle, I imagine it to be like,

Louise Neil (17:17): You

Kim Romain (17:25): you know, a therapist who shows up to a therapy session and starts talking about their shit. Like, no, you can share what's going on. I mean, we share it with our clients. We share it on the podcast. We share it with each other. It's yes, absolutely share if that's something that feels safe and aligned to do what's going on for you, how you use it, et cetera. But please for the love of God, don't use your platform, your tools as a way to do your own work.

Louise Neil (18:00): Hmm.

Kim Romain (18:02): Like that, you need to do your own work. So for me, right, so we started talking. So when we're recording this, we've just started the sun transit of gate 42 or gene key 42 and human design or gene keys. And I know I say those numbers really fast because quite frankly, I could tell, I'm sure we could get into the details of what those things are. I find that to be less important, quite frankly, than what we get from it.

Louise Neil (18:30): Mm-hmm.

Kim Romain (18:33): So the energy of these gates, these gene keys, it's really this place of completion. And so we were talking about before we hit record, we were talking about what needs to be completed or closed, and it doesn't need to be done. So what are those things that we have going on that are just done? We need to have them be done for the moment or done forever or whatever it is. So part of my work, now being in the energy because the energy wasn't here as of yesterday or last week. Now I can feel that energy or experience what that energy is that we're being gifted. What do I want to do with it? Well, what I want to do with it is to sit down and say, okay, the fuck am I done with? What am I just done with? And not done because it's not fun. Cause there's plenty of stuff that I'm ready to say I'm done cause it's not fun, but that's not reality.

Louise Neil (19:21): Yeah.

Kim Romain (19:35): So maybe I'm done with not having fun in doing some of those things. How can I bring more fun or joy or laughter into the mundane? I don't know. Maybe that'll be part of my exploration, but I'm going to do it.

Louise Neil (19:50): you

Kim Romain (19:52): Right? Because we have to do our work. You just like, you know, when you're feeling wobbly, I know you're doing work for yourself when you're having that and you're not bringing it into your client sessions.

Louise Neil (19:53): Yeah. No, because like much like a therapist, I guess sit there and unpack my own shit with with my clients. So this is how this is how today this is how it showed up for a client of mine, which I think is fascinating because it's like the same just in a different context. And so she was struggling a lot with again, overwhelmed, feeling really wobbly, all of the things. Right. And so just like The world is experiencing some upheaval around uncertainty of what's coming next and how to navigate that professionally. So like, what does that mean for my job? What does that mean when I'm here that there's a reorg coming and I don't know how that's going to impact me? I'm feeling pretty safe, she said, but I still don't know. But this constant like, do more with less energy that's happening.

Louise Neil (20:37): And the conversation that we ended up having today was that first of all is not true. No one does more with less. We do less with less. And when we look at what less looks like, our conversation went to, so where does she spend her time? That is only she can do those things. Right? Only she can. It is her gift, is her strengths, her superpower that she is designed to be in those spaces and get those things done because nobody else is gonna do those things. Those are those important things for her. And all of the other things are loud and noisy and they're somebody else's things. And so that really helped. Like when you talk about like, what am I complete with? Or like, what do I have to close? For her, was very much like all of a sudden she had this container that made it so much more clear as to what she needs to be doing. I just saw like that release, right? That like, whew, like now I have this thing that I can use to validate all of this busy noise, to say like, is it mine or not? Right? Is it mine to hold or mine to give away? And that example and what we talked about was very much work related, like what's my task and what's not, but it's also like, what's mine to hold in the energy space and what's mine to let go of?

Kim Romain (22:52): I don't care what system anybody uses. I really don't. I happen to find joy and ease and beauty in combining multiple systems. Human design, gene keys, astrology, Enneagram, MBTI. I use a lot of systems and I combine them together to get more data than anybody could ever want on themselves. And it doesn't matter what system people use. It's creating those containers and those opportunities to say exactly what you said, what is mine? What is mine? And that, think, is a question we don't ask enough. And it is what, on some level, many of the psychometric and personality assessments tell us, but they don't really tell us that directly. And yet, that's what they're...

Louise Neil (23:27): Yeah.

Kim Romain (23:49): really tell, like if you get into it, that is what they're telling us. And that is what I explore with my clients all the time. Yeah, this morning, working with one of my one-on-one clients, we were going through what are the current transits and movements, specifically how they're affecting her. And part of what we were peeling back, was what's transiting and what's always there and how what's transiting is highlighting what's always there when sometimes it will highlight what doesn't exist and give us an opportunity to play with some new energy. But in this case, there was this one transit that was significantly highlighting what was already there in multiple places in her charts. And this very brief window of transit is allowing her to go deeper into an understanding of what is hers. And it has nothing to do with her business or with her partnership or with her community. It has 100 % to do with how does she show up in all of those things embodying this place that is always there for her. But again, we get the spotlight on it in a slightly different nuanced way. So she gets to play with it in a different way. So she really understands what is hers. And it's a beautiful place. When we start to understand what's our, like whether it's a task or a way of being, we get to start playing with what's ours. That is the crux of personal agency. That is the crux of liberation. Because then whatever is happening, that noise, right, that wobbly feeling, I don't think can exist when we know what's ours. I mean, think about it, when you're feeling wobbly, do you know what's yours?

Louise Neil (25:59): Well, I think I've the reason why I feel wobbly is I've forgotten for a moment, right? What's mine? And it's like, ooh, all of these things are mine, right? All of these things to do all of this, right? Like all of these well, it should, right? Really is what it comes down to. And that creates this wobbly feeling. Absolutely. And when I can start to

Kim Romain (26:06): Yeah.

Louise Neil (26:26): put those things down and not be so worried about what I should be doing, but more about like, where's the space that I want to be in? Right? Like, really what I'm doing, I'm pivoting my business, right? Somewhat. I'm refocusing. so there's a lot of like, ooh, but this was working over here. This is a revenue generator. This is a thing over here.

Kim Romain (26:42): Mm-hmm. Yep.

Louise Neil (26:55): and it's not completely aligned with where I'm heading. And there are some overlap for sure, but there's some things that aren't. And so as I'm pivoting and trying to look over here to the east where the sun is rising, I find sometimes my attention is just pulled back to some of these other more antiquated things that were working for me. And it gets really hard to let go of that. And I and I know I see myself and my clients all the time, which is one of the cool things about doing this work is that. Right. And I know therapists and counselors, they say the same thing all the time, because like you could be sitting there and could be talking to someone. And like my mind is like, my God, this is me. And I get so much from my clients because it's like, yeah.

Kim Romain (27:32): you

Louise Neil (27:53): Let me put that in my pocket so that I can go do the work later. But it really is about like, sure, right? I'm reminded again that I'm not done the work and that I'm still doing that. But it's very, very much this pivot. And when women want to pivot in their careers or pivot, right? Pivot how they're showing up, it's the same things. Right? We get stuck on some of these, these false, I'm going to call them false beliefs because we believe that's the only way to do something. Right? That's the only way we make money. That's the only thing I'm good at. That's the only way of life, which just isn't true. But we get stuck there sometimes.

Kim Romain (28:42): Yeah, it's, I'm gonna go back to the planets for a minute. So the planets keep doing their things. We hear about these retrogrades, you the one that's most popular is the, and I'm giving squiggly signs if you're not watching me. So like they do these things and like Mercury retrograde is the one we hear most about, but they all go retrograde. They all go retrograde.

Louise Neil (28:57): You

Kim Romain (29:10): And they do that not so we can revisit, but one of the things that happens when that energy shifts and it goes backwards is we get to revisit these things for ourselves. And so some of what you're talking about is false narrative, right? We've been conditioned into these false narratives that we have now instilled in ourselves as beliefs and breaking down beliefs and stepping away from belief is creating a new choice. And that can be really, really hard. And some of it is when we have that moment of, for fuck's sake, why do I keep going through this? That tends to be something is retrograding something for somewhere for you, right? Whether it's a plant, something is retrograding. You're getting an opportunity to go deeper, to learn more. We are not here. Like, I don't believe we are here in this lifetime or any lifetime.

Louise Neil (29:51): You

Louise Neil (30:00): You

Kim Romain (30:11): to have it all figured out. Because if we were, I'd really have no faith in humanity that it's taken this long for people to figure it out. We're just, we're just, we're just doing that. We're figuring it out and we're using whatever tools, whatever belief systems, whatever, whatever's to experiment with it. And there is no single one that's right. That's why there's so many different ways that we can experience this. And we get to figure out for ourselves what works. We get to go back into the,

Louise Neil (30:49): Yeah.

Kim Romain (30:51): revising and pivoting and realigning and shifting. I mean, how could you imagine not doing that? Of being stagnant? No thanks.

Louise Neil (31:03): Okay, so you did a really cool post on LinkedIn earlier this week about stuck, about stuckness. You did. And I thought it was a really great reframe around stuck and feeling stuck and being stuck. And I think that plays nicely into this conversation around like, it's not that we're stuck. Like we might feel like we're

Kim Romain (31:08): I

Kim Romain (31:21): Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thanks.

Louise Neil (31:32): revisiting something or feel like we're not moving forward. But when we can reframe that, it's like, no, this is a moment of reflection, right? This is a moment of contemplation. This is a moment of validation. Sometimes it's even a moment of permission, right? And that's such a key piece, like that reframe of stuck and how we can actually be using that to to like move forward.

Kim Romain (32:06): Yeah, we've, I think, I know what I've experienced and what I've seen is very often, and I'm trying to figure out which comes first, but like the wobble and the stuck go together. Maybe we're feeling wobbly and then that lands us in this feeling of, now I can't move forward. Right? We're chasing ourselves. We're avoiding or we're overanalyzing or we're diving.

Louise Neil (32:27): yeah, yeah.

Kim Romain (32:32): We're doing whatever. And now we're, now we are, we're spinning in place and it feels stuck. But we're, I don't believe we ever are really stuck, right? We, we're...

Kim Romain (32:43): That, I think, is a false narrative. And he do write that that was kind of the underbelly of that post is this idea that we're not ever stuck. We've created this idea that when we're going in circles, we're stuck. We're just on repeat, right? I mean, think about the skips in the records back in the day when we had records.

Louise Neil (33:14): Kids have records these days. My kiddo has a great record.

Kim Romain (33:18): Do they still skip though? or has technology. Okay, cool. So it still skips. Okay. So I know we really want to get, we want LPs back because that would be really awesome. But the, When it would skip, when the record would skip and you'd get in that groove and you would just, right? A little Max Headroom moment. I'm really dating myself now.

Louise Neil (33:20): They can. No, no, it still happens.

Louise Neil (33:38): hahahahah

Kim Romain (33:48): But it's not stuck. You either tap it so it moves, or you pick it up and you put it on a different place. It's not stuck. It's just in a temporary loop. Even in programs, right? If we're coding something. I used to do lots of coding and I would get in these loops and it's like, my God, how do I get out of that loop? Okay, it's just a matter of finding your way through. To me, stuck is if somebody has poured cement into a hole while you were standing there. It's going to be really hard to get out of it. Probably still can, but it's going to be really, really hard.

Louise Neil (34:28): Yeah. Yeah. When I say wobbly around that feeling, what I imagine is like I'm crossing a river, right? And there's the stepping stones and like, it's like, yeah, like this looks great. I'm gonna cross the river right here. I could see all the stones. It's gonna get me to the other side and I get halfway and that rock starts to move underneath your feet. And you're like, my gosh, I can't, I can't move. I can't lift one foot off of this, of the stepping stone because I'm going to slip and fall. And so all of a sudden it feels like all my time and energy and everything is just so focused on not falling in the river. Right. And it feels wobbly and it's like, Ooh, I can't, I can't take a step. I can't take a step forward. I can't take a step back. And, and yet, yes, yes. Right. Taking a step gets you off the waffle. But I have no idea it's gonna put me in the river. I have no idea if I'm gonna slip and fall. Like I think I might. And how deep is the river? Why am I freaking out about getting a little wet? Maybe that's okay. Right?

Kim Romain (35:48): Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Louise Neil (35:50): Nobody likes a booter, but right when when you get one like you're going to survive and I still can I can still move and get across but that's always what I imagine. That's exactly what it feels like to me is like I'm so wobbly. All I'm doing is focusing on the wobble. I'm focusing on this thing and I can't I can't take that step, but you're right. Like we're not stuck.

Kim Romain (36:17): We're not stuck. We're not stuck. And it's so interesting in that visual that you just gave, I think about how scared I'd be. there are certain, anything that deals with potential physical harm scares me. Like I have the, I'm gonna call it irrational fear, but maybe it's not so irrational to be afraid of being physically harmed. I don't know. But I do. I get really, really scared. And so I thought, like, I went to that place of, what would I do? I would breathe. So if I'm in that wobble, I'm going to breathe because what is my purpose? What is my focus in that moment? What is the most important thing in that moment? The most important thing in that moment is that I get across the river. That's the most important thing. Because otherwise I'm going to have to figure out how to live on this wobbly rock. Like those are my two options. I will either get across the river somehow, turn around and go back. Like that's still like, whatever. Or I camp out and I live the rest of my life on this rock.

Louise Neil (37:09): Sure. Right. Right.

Kim Romain (37:25): So for me, when you were saying that, I was like, OK, that would be terrifying for me, depending on the river. So I'm imagining like white water type of river. Be terrifying for me. And I would breathe, and I'd say, OK, what do I need to do? I need to make a decision. Am I carrying on? Am I moving forward? Or am I going to find a different way? Am I going to go back and find a different way? That's what I need to do. So I need to come to a place of decision.

Kim Romain (38:02): And that comes again for me, and I think for most people, it's going to come from going back inside and feeling what is that internal alignment. Now, my fear might say, turn around, fuck it, we're done. But that might not be the most aligned decision. So I have to be there for a moment and go, OK, what really is my focus here? Why do I need to get across the river? What's on the other side? Is my family on the other side? And if I don't make it, I don't see them again? Well then I'm, yes, I'm getting across the river. If it's because there's a cute sandwich shop that I wanted to get to, probably not. I can turn around, I can find another sandwich shop. But I have to know, I have to know myself going back to what is mine. What is my choice to make in that moment?

Louise Neil (38:46): Yeah, yeah. And for me, yes. And for me, it's like also like when I can come back to myself, when I can like just say, okay, like for a moment, let's just be here, breathe, be present. I now have the full capacity to check my surroundings. And now I get to say, is it a crazy whitewater river and it's 10 feet deep and I'm gonna be swept away?

Kim Romain (39:07): Yes.

Louise Neil (39:15): Or am I actually on a creek and I could just say, fuck it, I'm getting wet and go for it or step off the path and create my own way.

Kim Romain (39:26): Mm-hmm. Yeah. I had that actually happen in Mexico. I was terrified. I was like, I don't know if I can make it across. And the person I was with was like, it's like two inches deep. like, it looks much deeper than that. She's like, it's seriously not that deep. And I was on a wobbly rock. I took off my shoes and I was like, okay, I'm trusting you. I took off my shoes and I blazed a different path. And I was like, Oh, you're right. It's not that deep. I'm fine. It was a little deeper than two inches, but like it was still, I was fine. And I was able to make it to the other side. And so sometimes it takes that other person or somebody else to help us when we're feeling the wobble to say, okay, remind us, come back to self. Give me, maybe give me a little bit more data. Maybe give me a little bit more information. And so, right. And it's the same thing with your client today.

Louise Neil (39:54): Right. Yeah. Yeah.

Kim Romain (40:22): Right? Needing just a little bit more information, needing a way to contain. Right? And that's what the breath does for us. That's what coming back to our bodies does for us. It gives us a way to contain all the noise. those people that are tapping into all the noise and making it louder because they can. And for the rest of the world going, that's too loud and now it's made me nervous. Okay, great, create a container. Go back to yourself. curious, when we started this conversation, before we hit record, I know neither us knew where it was going to go, but then you really hit record.

Louise Neil (40:59): You

Kim Romain (41:02): Where did you think we were going to go with that conversation?

Louise Neil (41:06): I felt that it needed to come out today because of all of this stuff. You are tapped into the planets and I was going to say the stars, but I guess they're just planets. You're tapped into that energy. I'm just feeling like a different kind of energy that's going on and I'm trying to make sense of it all.

Kim Romain (41:23): they're whatever, they're things.

Kim Romain (41:28): Mm-hmm.

Louise Neil (41:34): and I'm trying to understand is like, you know, I don't remember feeling this way before. Maybe I have and I didn't have the words or the language for it. But what I'm noticing very much is how to use my full body to make decisions that make sense for me. And that's where we were coming from when we hit record because I was like, ooh, this is really important because this is what it means to embody your empowerment. Imagine that.

Kim Romain (42:20): Ooh, that was sexy.

Louise Neil (42:23): Right?

Kim Romain (42:26): Yeah. And that's what it is. So, so for me, the... the planets, human design, all of the assessments, they give me, it's interesting, I'm not a one. I do have some one line energy in with some of my design, but I'm not designed as a line one, I'm a four, six. And it helps me make sense of things. It gives me information to go, oh, okay, I get it. I don't have to like it. I don't have to... whatever, but I can look at it go, okay. Again, it's a container, right? I'm not looking at the world going, holy fuck what's happening.

Kim Romain (43:13): which is what a lot of people are doing right now, right? Still trying to make sense of it. And I'm not saying that I... Yes, looking at all of the star planet transity stuff is helpful. There's also the understanding of human psychology and sociology and well-being and like soaking that in over 55 years. there's a, and studying, like there's a lot of stuff there and being able to blend it has created a container for me to be able to say, to make sense of it.

Louise Neil (43:56): Mm-hmm.

Kim Romain (43:58): and to then be able to make my own choices within it. Which that is the epitome of being empowered.

Louise Neil (44:05): Yeah.

Kim Romain (44:07): I can make choices every day that are in alignment that work for me that don't leave me feeling wobbly most of the time. And when I do feel wobbly or crunchy or whatever, I have something to come back to to help ground me. Because, you know, yeah, I get it. The world is loud. This is my life. And as, as some people will be like, well, that's selfish. Is your life, it is like, it's your life. You get to live your life. We get to live them together in this world. And that's pretty cool. And that's where community comes in and we love that. And again, it comes back to like, what's my part? Well, I have to, I have to know me and I have to be with me and I have to be selfish in the way of saying, this is my life and I don't want to live it miserable. I don't want to live it unhappy. I don't want to live it discombobulated. I've done that. I don't want to do that anymore. So I'm going to find containers to help me stay aligned with myself so I don't have to do that anymore. Cool conversation, Louise.

Louise Neil (45:23): Wow, this is awesome.

Kim Romain (45:28): So Louise, you mentioned pivoting in your business. What do you have coming up that you want to make sure the world, the world, the people know about?

Louise Neil (45:37): So yeah, I'm putting out my Rise and Redefine program so folks can connect with me on that. And that's all about the intersectionality of careers and menopause and where they collide and how we navigate that kind of wobble in the world. So you can check that out in the show notes. Absolutely. How about you, Kim?

Kim Romain (46:01): always have a million, irons in the fire. So, Rising Visionaries is a great place to come and hang out. If you are looking for a place to be grounded and a container to come back to, always a great place. I'm getting really excited because I'm having some, really juicy conversations, about the future of Strengthscape. the tool that I created that uses, that looks at all those different assessments and brings them together into a beautiful package for people to work with. And I'm doing some really cool stuff with nonprofits too. So like all the things, if any of those things sound exciting, they're all on my website.

Louise Neil (46:42): I love it. Thank you for this today. I really loved this conversation.

Kim Romain (46:49): Me too, thank you. And thank you listener for popping by and hanging out with us today.

Louise Neil (46:55): Thanks everyone. Take care.

Kim Romain (46:58): Bye.

Kim Romain (46:59): And that's all for this week's episode of the Empowered and Embodied Show. We hope today's episode has sparked something within you. Remember, we're all on this journey together. If something did resonate with you today, why not share it with a friend who might need to hear it too? You can find us everywhere you listen to podcasts. Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode. And if you're feeling generous, leave a review. Your feedback not only helps others find the show, but also helps us understand what's most valuable to you. Until next time, be kind to yourself, stay curious, and remember, we're walking right alongside you. Thanks for being part of our community.